Wednesday, December 7, 2011
So have you ever been letdown by the same person over and over again? I have and it sucks ass. So how do you fix this? Talk to them about it and hope the problem doesn't persist. What about if it does though? Then you can cut ties. There are people in my life who have lied to me and disappointed me over and over again. I give out second, third, fourth, and even in some cases twentieth chances but at a point in time enough is enough. I've hit that point with someone who is extremely close to me. Now I'm giving up. Firing them from my life because they've put other things over me one too many times. I can handle this with maturity except for two facts: A.) They live with me (till the end of the year at least). B.) My best friend is siding with them. So what do I do when I've had enough? Do I keep on with the suffering and keep my mouth shut or do I stand up for myself and risk losing my BFF? God, why do you put so many challenges in front of me? I can only handle so much and all this hurt is turning me viscous and bitter... I hate it.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
I really should watch that movie lol. Anyway so my night didn't end up sucking ass anyway. My only problem is not listening to my heart. I made up with the bestie and she doesn't seem mad at me but now we're planning her wedding. Just need to find the groom. She says she wants a wedding. Too bad she's 1) not even 16 and 2) single. Plus she wants to wait 10 years. So I have a while to help her plan, that might just push me up the list to maid of honor. And the other part of my horrible night replied making me realize that the answer to my awkward question to him was looking me straight in the eye. We ended things on a deep fried pickle note and I left it at my goofy side. But I realized how the hell am I gonna get to know this guy if I tell him the words other people put in my mouth. I want him to know me. Straightforward, sarcastic, sometimes bitter but mainly sweet, oddball, awkward me. Not the girl my friends try to make me sound like on Facebook. I learn from my own mistakes and honestly I don't want my biggest boy mistake to be him, but I'm not changing myself for that to happen. I'll let him know the real me.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Today I've hit a low. It sucks ass. I hurt my bestfriend and got the boy I am totally crushing over to stop talking to me. My week was awesome til now. I have gone a week without freaking out. Although I'm not now I still feel like shit. I told a guy to like my best friends profile pic nut ended up telling her the truth. She's upset. Then I asked this guy I have the hots for why he was single. It is the exact definition of word-vomit. Watch Mean Girls... Well goodbye good week hello bittersweet.